i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I think my moral compass just broke
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
