happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
you made out with another girl for some wings
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