matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
