I wish I only lived at night.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
