i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I have aggressive nipples.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
i think im in europe. pls send help
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
