scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
