love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
