And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Randomize
