Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
