is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
