Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
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