don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Little spoons don't ask big questions
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
