Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
My feet surprised me
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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