You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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