in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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