I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize
