Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
