He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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