So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Just high enough for therapy.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
