I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize