Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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