I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I wish you could order shots online.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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