Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
