I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
