Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize