yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize