he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
