ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
