You work out of a Hotel?
I just saw a hot homeless man
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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