So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Randomize