just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
either way he was missing a nipple.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize