There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
