I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
