He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
