before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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