I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
