did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize