I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
