whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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