kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
