Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
You took a bar mat shot.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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