gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Acid is not a monday night drug
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
