i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
