CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
