We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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