I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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