Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
