I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
