i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
