Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
