I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize