Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize